EXPERIMENT IN TERRA (telemovie version of episode)

Written by Glen A. Larson

Transcribed by Clay Arden for ByYourCommand.net

 

 

(Adama’s quarters)

 

ADAMA

(recording log)

It is now seven sectars since the escape of our captives, numbering amongst them a group of Nomen and the dangerous soldiers from the Eastern Alliance, whose ominous destroyers apparently cruise these skies in search of any opposition to their political will.  I have a recon patrol launched to track the escaping destroyer to its base on Lunar Seven.  Once located, we can assess the strength of the Alliance on the outpost and determine our next step.

 

(Eastern Alliance destroyer)

 

ALLIANCE OFFICER (OS)

Commander, we have just picked up alien fighters tracking us.

 

(Vipers in space, tracking the destroyer)

 

STARBUCK

Apollo.

 

APOLLO

I got ’em.  Attention Blue Squadron, this is Flight Leader Apollo.  We now have the destroyer on scanner, and we’ll follow them.  But hear this, I do not, repeat, do not want that ship overtaken.  Starbuck, you move out on point.  And be careful, stay out of their range.

 

STARBUCK

(sighs)

 

APOLLO

The rest of us will begin to spread out on either flank of that destroyer. 

 

BOOMER

May I ask why?

 

APOLLO

To increase our scanner range in case they have any idea of bringing in more destroyers from the side to catch us in a crossfire.

 

BOOMER

Ouch.

 

APOLLO

Yeah.  Okay, Blue Squadron, we know where Target One is.  Let’s look around and see if we can find any more.  We don’t want any surprises.

 

(Adama’s quarters)

 

ADAMA

Enter. 

(Tigh enters)

No word?

 

TIGH

No.  I’m getting concerned.

 

ADAMA

What lies beyond that destroyer concerns me.  We’re heading directly into a war zone. 

 

TIGH

Adama, if I may suggest.

 

ADAMA

Please.

 

TIGH

Why don’t we bypass Lunar Seven entirely?  Take the fleet on to the mother planet, Terra. 

 

ADAMA

And what then?  How do we assess the true predicament of those people, who’s in the right, who’s in the wrong?

 

TIGH

Well, surely the Alliance is in the wrong.

 

ADAMA

I would think so.  But suppose both sides are partially wrong.  Do we meddle in their affairs, and perhaps lend our superior technology to the wrong side?

 

TIGH

Adama, we are not gods.  We’ve got our own people to think about.

 

ADAMA

Yes, that’s true.  And so we must wait for our patrol to report on the true situation on Lunar Seven.

 

(Vipers in space)

 

APOLLO

(pursued by the Ship of Lights)

What’s that sound?  Oh! Ah! Ahh!  Too loud!  Ah!  Stop!  I can’t--  Ah!  Ahh!

 

BOOMER

Starbuck.

 

STARBUCK

Yo.

 

BOOMER

Has the Captain pulled up there with you?

 

STARBUCK

No, he’s back there with you.

 

BOOMER

Uh-uh.

 

STARBUCK

What do you mean, “uh-uh”?  He sent me up ahead to check out this destroyer.

 

BOOMER

(sighs)

Then he divided the squadron.  He and I moved off together.

 

STARBUCK

Well?

 

BOOMER

Then he disappeared.  I mean he vanished right off my screen.

 

STARBUCK

Jolly, you close enough to come up and take my place?

 

JOLLY

I’ve got you on my scanner.

 

STARBUCK

Okay, well, get up here fast.  I’m moving up to join Boomer.

 

JOLLY

Moving out.

 

(Ship of Lights)

 

SERAPH

Welcome back, Captain Apollo.

 

APOLLO

Where am I?

 

SERAPH

You remember.

 

APOLLO

I’m not sure.

 

SERAPH

That’s to be expected.

 

APOLLO

Where’s my ship?  I gotta get back to my ship.  A lot of lives depend on it.

 

SERAPH

A lot more lives depend on your not getting back to your ship.

 

APOLLO

What?

 

SERAPH

I think it’s time you met someone.

 

(John appears.)

 

JOHN

Hello.

 

APOLLO

Who are you?

 

JOHN

I’m sorry.  We must keep the amenities short, Captain.  Time is running out for us.

 

APOLLO

What are you talking about?  Where am I?  What am I doing here?

 

JOHN

Oh, yes.  All recollection of your last visit was blocked out, wasn’t it?  Very well.  You can call me John, and to put it briefly, we’re brothers.

 

APOLLO

(not comprehending)

We’re brothers.

 

JOHN

In a way, yes.  Of course, we are several generations, literally eons, ahead of you.

 

APOLLO

Then you can’t be from Terra.

 

JOHN

Oh, no, no, no.  Otherwise they wouldn’t be in so much trouble.  And that’s where you come in.  You have got to help them.

 

APOLLO

Me, help them?

 

JOHN

And to help yourself.  Now, you must move swiftly.  We will get you as close to Terra as we can without causing complication.  And then, the rest is up to you.

 

APOLLO

Wait!  Wait!  Uh, John!  John, what are you talking about?  Terra is very far away.  It would take—

 

JOHN

The ship will be there before you’ll know it.

 

APOLLO

And then what?

 

JOHN

I’m afraid you must do your best to stop a war.

 

APOLLO

(sighs exasperatedly)

John, this is ridiculous.  You say that you’re eons ahead of me and you want me to stop a war on a planet I don’t know anything about?  Why don’t you stop it?

 

JOHN

Apollo, I can’t expect you to understand physical and material laws that transcend you by many generations.  The simple truth is, I cannot be seen by the people of Terra outside the environment of this ship.  I have no physical body as you know it.

 

APOLLO

(indicating)

What do you call that?

 

JOHN

A reflection of intelligence.  My spirit, if you will.

APOLLO

Look, uh, John, if you’re so advanced, why do you care what happens to the people on Terra?

 

JOHN

Let us say that what happens to the people on Terra can affect us as well as you and your people.  I’m afraid we’re only in a position to advise.

 

APOLLO

Then do it!  Advise them.  Advise me.  Tell me what’s going on.

 

JOHN

You’ll find that out for yourself as soon as you arrive on Terra.  In the meantime, let me counsel you not to be alarmed if the people you encounter seem to think of you as someone they know.

 

APOLLO

How’s that again?

 

JOHN

You haven’t got time to build up a credibility on Terra, so we’re borrowing someone else’s.  A warrior who’s missing.  Missing in combat, I think you call it. 

 

APOLLO

What happened to him?

 

JOHN

Oh, he’s being held captive on Lunar One against his wishes.  He’ll eventually escape.  Oh, I should mention that he’s a bit of a scoundrel, but he’s all we’ve got to work with.  So, make allowances if you’re not the most popular man on Terra.

 

APOLLO

(sighs)

I’m dreaming all this, right?  I’m in my ship in a state of flight slumber and when I wake up I’ll realize this was all a dream, right?

 

JOHN

What an excellent idea.

 

(Apollo’s Viper in space)

 

APOLLO

(wakes up in cockpit and laughs)

Wow!  Better give up the night life or have my oxygen checked.  Ha! 

(notices his uniform)

My uniform’s turned white! 

(sees the planet Terra)

It wasn’t a dream.

 

(Vipers in space)

 

STARBUCK

Nothing.  Not a trace.

 

BOOMER

We’ve barely got enough fuel to complete our mission and rendezvous with the Galactica.

 

STARBUCK

Well, I can’t stop now.  Apollo’s out there somewhere.

 

BOOMER

We could get the Galactica to come to us.  We’re too far for voice communication.

 

STARBUCK

What if we turned on our long-range distress beacon?

 

BOOMER

Oh, they’d pick that up.  So might any destroyers in the area.

 

STARBUCK

Well, it’s either that or give up on Apollo. 

(blip appears on scanner)

I got it.  It’s a long-range distress signal.  That’s gotta be Apollo.

 

BOOMER

There’s no way he could have overflown our normal scanners in the short period of time he’s been—

 

STARBUCK

There it is.  Boomer.  Good Lord!

 

BOOMER

It’s coming from way off in the wrong direction, Starbuck, and it must be well beyond any chance of having enough fuel to get back.

 

STARBUCK

Well, let’s just pray that the fleet picks up my beacon and follows me.

 

BOOMER

(laughs sarcastically)

Follows you?  I’m coming with you.

 

STARBUCK

Ah, you can’t, Boomer.  You have to take command of the squadron.  Continue our primary mission:  follow that destroyer to Lunar Seven. 

 

BOOMER

Starbuck, we could lose both of you.

 

STARBUCK

He’s one of my closest friends.  He’s in some kind of trouble and I’m going to help him or die trying.  I’ll be seein’ ya.

 

(Adama’s quarters)

 

TIGH (on viewscreen)

Commander?

 

ADAMA

Yes, Colonel.

 

TIGH

You’d better come up to the bridge right away.

 

ADAMA

What is it?

 

TIGH

I haven’t the slightest idea, Commander.  Certainly nothing that makes any sense.

 

(Brenda’s car, on Terra)

 

BRENDA

I’ll kill him.  I will kill him.  Not a word in six weeks and he has the nerve to call me up in the middle of the night to come and pick him up— oh, man!  Charlie Watts, when I find you I am going to kill you with my bare hands!

(screeches to a stop as she sees Apollo ahead waving his arms)

 

APOLLO

Uh, please don’t be alarmed—

 

BRENDA

Charlie!

(gets out of car)

 

APOLLO

Charlie?

 

BRENDA

It’s like seeing a ghost!  Oh!

(hugs Apollo)

 

APOLLO

That’s entirely possible.

 

(in Brenda’s car)

 

BRENDA

Oh, Charlie, I thought you were dead!  I m— I mean, I get this call in the middle of the night to come pick you up in the middle of nowhere— I don’t know.  W—w—where’d you get that getup?  You look like you’ve been to a costume party.

 

APOLLO

My ship crashed.

 

BRENDA

Oh, Charlie, you mean you’ve been wandering around in the desert that long?  And where’d you find a phone to call me?

 

APOLLO

A phone?

 

BRENDA

Are you sure you’re all right?

 

APOLLO

(sighs)

I’m very confused.

 

BRENDA

Honey, I’m gonna take you to a hospital.  You sound delirious.

 

APOLLO

No, look, uh, is there someplace more private we could go?  Uh—I—I need to get my bearings.

 

BRENDA

Charlie, I really think you need medical help.

 

APOLLO

I feel fine.  I just need time to think.  Uh—what was your name?

 

BRENDA

(shakes head)

Amnesia.

 

APOLLO

Amnesia.  That’s a pretty name.  You don’t know anybody named John, do ya?

 

BRENDA

Charlie, I’m gonna get you some help.

 

APOLLO

No! 

(sighs)

Would you just do as I say?

 

BRENDA

Okay!  Okay.  We’ll go to my apartment.

 

APOLLO

(sighs)

 

(Brenda’s apartment)

 

BRENDA

I need a drink.

 

APOLLO

(looking at apartment)

This is nice! 

(with a laugh)

Does everyone get one of these?

 

BRENDA

Charlie, have a heart.  We had something special once.  You know, it—it wasn’t exactly a one-night stand either.

 

APOLLO

(looking in mirror)

I don’t look any different.

 

BRENDA

No, I know you don’t.

 

APOLLO

This doesn’t make any sense.  Wonder what this Charlie Watts looks like.

 

BRENDA

What did you say?

 

APOLLO

Huh?  Oh, oh, I was just talking to myself.

 

BRENDA

That’s not a good sign, Charlie. 

 

APOLLO

Um, look, um, Amnesia—

 

BRENDA

(laughs)

 

APOLLO

Ah, I’m gonna have to level with you, ahm. 

(sighs, laughs)

I know this is gonna sound a little crazy at first, but, uh, I don’t know what else to do.

 

BRENDA

You don’t have to do anything.  I’m gonna go change my clothes, and I’ll—

 

APOLLO

You wouldn’t think of doing anything foolish, would ya?

 

BRENDA

(laughs)

Like what?

 

APOLLO

Like getting in touch with someone?

 

BRENDA

Hey, wasn’t I the one who was always honest in our relationship?

 

APOLLO

You tell me.

 

BRENDA

(sighs)

You haven’t changed.  I’ll be right back.

(goes upstairs)

 

JOHN

(appearing)

You can’t tell her the truth.

 

APOLLO

How did you get here?  I thought you said you didn’t have a body.

 

JOHN

A reflection.  Remember?

 

APOLLO

What have you gotten me into?  Who is this Charlie Watts?

 

JOHN

Someone whose identity will get you inside the Praesidium with the truth about what has been happening on Lunar Seven and Paradeen. 

 

(Brenda’s upstairs bedroom)

 

BRACE (on Brenda’s viewscreen)

We’ll get a team over there as soon as possible.  Brenda, be careful.

 

BRENDA

Don’t worry, I will. 

 

(downstairs)

 

APOLLO

Look, uh, John, you’re gonna have to clear up a few things for me first, because I don’t know what’s going on here!

 

JOHN

You know quite a lot.  I can fill in a few gaps.

 

APOLLO

My face.  H-how is it possible that this Charlie Watts is an exact lookalike?

 

JOHN

He isn’t.  They merely perceive you to look like him.  Actually he’s quite an attractive fellow.

 

APOLLO

(sighs)

That’s very funny.  At least you have a sense of humor.

 

JOHN

In my job dealing with primitive cultures, it’s an absolute necessity.

 

APOLLO

Primitive. 

(clears throat) 

Well, primitive or not, if I get the feeling you’re gonna just leave me hanging out there all by myself, I just might be tempted to tell them everything I know about you, John, and then see how far my story gets you.

 

JOHN

Well, actually, I’m not merely helping these people.  I’m also helping you, and yours.

 

APOLLO

Then you’d better start leveling with me, John.  I want to know exactly what’s going on and what’s expected of me.

 

JOHN

I’m not sure I’m permitted to work that way.

 

APOLLO

Well, you’d better find out, because I’m not going to cooperate until I’m sure whose side you’re on.

 

BRENDA

(coming downstairs)

Charlie!  I’m on your side, of course!

 

APOLLO

Explain your way out of this one, John.

 

BRENDA

“John.”  Well—

(laughs)

I guess that’s better than Amnesia.  Welcome home, Charlie. 

(kisses Apollo)

 

JOHN

Her name is Brenda.

 

APOLLO

Thanks.

 

BRENDA

(laughs)

You’re welcome.

(kisses him again, laughs)

 

APOLLO

Look, uh, Brenda, you’re gonna have to tell me everything my friend here won’t.

 

BRENDA

(looking toward John’s location)

Your friend.

 

APOLLO

Yeah.

 

JOHN

She can’t see me, Apollo.  Only you can, and then only in your protected state.

 

APOLLO

My protected state?

 

JOHN

You presently enjoy a protecting white aura.  Let your uniform be your guide.  As soon as it returns to normal color, look out.  You’re in trouble.  Until then.

(vanishes)

 

APOLLO

John!  John, you—

 

BRENDA

Oh – poor Charlie.  Honey, listen to me.  Whatever happens, I want you to know that I still love you, and I want the — I want the very, very best of care for you.  Even if you did walk out on me six weeks ago.

 

APOLLO

(sighs, then notices picture of General Maxwell)

Who’s that?

 

BRENDA

Charlie!  Don’t be cruel!  You know my father’s been missing in action.  Well, maybe you don’t know, you’ve been away so long.  We haven’t heard from him in four weeks. 

 

APOLLO

(sighs again)

I’m sorry.

(door chime rings)

Who’s that?

 

BRENDA

It’s my regular dinner service.  I’m always too tired to cook when I come home from work.  You know that!

 

(Brenda opens door to reveal Brace and an armed security officer.)

 

BRACE

(motions to Brenda not to speak)

Colonel?  Hold it right there!  Don’t make us use force.

 

APOLLO

(sighs)

Thanks, Brenda.

 

BRENDA
Charlie, I was thinking of you.  Ya need some help.

 

APOLLO

You need help, all of you.  That’s why I’m here.

 

BRACE

Don’t make this any harder on me, Colonel Watts.  I want you to come with us.  Now.

 

APOLLO

(sighs)

Thanks, John.

(to Brenda)

Come visit me, if any of us are still around.

 

(Dr. Horning’s office in prison building)

 

HORNING

Good news, Colonel.  You’re in excellent condition. 

 

APOLLO

Then I can go?

 

HORNING

After a brief period of observation.

 

APOLLO

Observation?  Look, I feel fine.  Y-you said so yourself.  What’s all this observation felgercarb?

 

HORNING

“Felgercarb”?  Guards!

 

(Guards arrive to remove him from the room.)

 

APOLLO

No.  No, wai-wait.  You don’t understand.  John!  Get me out of here or I’ll spill everything!

 

HORNING

“John”?

(makes some notes)

 

(Apollo is taken to a cell.)

 

BRACE

Oh, uh, by the way, Colonel, if you are – if you’re thinking about escaping—

(tosses an object at force field, which incinerates it)

Fun, huh?

 

APOLLO

John, what am I supposed to do now?

 

(President Arends’ office)

 

MOORE

Mr. President.

 

PRESIDENT

How is this possible, when I had your word Charlie Watts was on Lunar One safely tucked away?

 

MOORE

I don’t know, Mr. President, but ever since Lunar One was attacked by the Eastern Alliance, our information’s been very sketchy. 

 

PRESIDENT

(sighs)

 

MOORE

Maybe he’s escaped.

 

PRESIDENT

How could he escape when everyone else on that planet has been annihilated?  When a fleet of Eastern Alliance destroyers obliterates everything that traverses from Terra?

 

MOORE

I don’t know, sir, but he’s here. 

 

PRESIDENT

Who else knows about it?

 

MOORE

Well, only a girl and the security guards.  I’ll see that she’s handled.

 

PRESIDENT

Good, good.  I’m sorry, but it is necessary.

 

MOORE

Uh, yes, of course.  Oh, one more thing, Mr. President.  Earlier this evening, an unidentified flying craft entered our airspace.

 

PRESIDENT

An Eastern Alliance ship?

 

MOORE

Well, I’m not sure.  Our interceptors tried to track it, but it was too fast.  They lost it on their radar.

 

PRESIDENT

Ah, it was probably an optical illusion.  Or flying fatigue.  The Praesidium is so convinced that there’s going to be a sneak attack from the Eastern Alliance, they have our boys in the air night and day.

 

MOORE

Yes, well, ordinarily I would dismiss it too, sir, but there’s just been another incident.

 

PRESIDENT

Another unidentified flying craft?

 

MOORE

We lost it on our radar somewhere outside the city.  Our ground teams are searching for it now.

 

PRESIDENT

Well, keep me informed.

 

MOORE

Mr. President, about the Praesidium – perhaps now would be the best time to inform the Praesidium of the extensive damage caused to our outposts by the, uh, Eastern Alliance.

 

PRESIDENT

Mr. Moore, if you do not want to wind up in detention with the rest of our disloyal officers, you will respect my wishes.  I have no intention of allowing that body of warmongers to interfere with my peace treaty with the Eastern Alliance!

 

MOORE

Mr. President, my loyalty is beyond challenge. 

 

PRESIDENT

Then help me!  Help me to keep that band of warlords which calls itself a Praesidium from hurtling us into an abyss which will end all civilization on this planet!

 

MOORE

Yes, Mr. President.

 

(Galactica bridge)

 

ADAMA

Yes, Tigh.

 

TIGH

Emergency beacons from Vipers Four and Two are transmitting from this quadrant. 

(indicating)

 

ADAMA

That’s quite a distance from Lunar Seven.

 

TIGH

Yes, sir.  If our geoscan is correct, it’s probably coming from somewhere near Terra.

 

ADAMA

Well, that Eastern Alliance destroyer must have bypassed Lunar Seven and gone directly to Terra.

 

TIGH

I wouldn’t think it had that kind of speed.

 

ADAMA

What’s the patrol report?

 

TIGH

(sighs)

They’re out of range.  We can pick up the blip from their emergency beacon, but we can’t communicate with them.

 

ADAMA

We’ll never catch them at the speed we’re flying.  Put me on Unicom, please.

 

OMEGA

Unicom, Commander.

 

ADAMA

Thank you.  People of the fleet, this is Commander Adama.  The Galactica is temporarily leaving the fleet to meet with one of our long-range patrols.  It is purely precautionary.  Two full squadrons of Vipers will escort you to our rendezvous point.  Thank you.

(to Omega)

Unicom out.

(to Tigh)

Tigh, plot a course for Terra.

 

TIGH

What velocity, sir?

 

ADAMA

Light speed.

 

TIGH

Sir, it has been some time since the Galactica has been pushed to—

 

ADAMA

Light speed, Colonel.

 

TIGH

Yes, sir.

 

(surface of Terra at night, where Starbuck has landed his Viper next to Apollo’s)

 

STARBUCK

Apollo! 

 

(Starbuck plays back recording in Apollo’s cockpit.)

 

APOLLO (recorded voice)

This is Captain Apollo.  In the event that any of the Galactica warriors should successfully track me, I have set out on foot for a large city.  I will keep my personal communicator on standby to act as a homing device.  Be careful.  I don’t know if we’re in friendly or enemy territory. 

 

(Transport vehicles with powerful searchlights approach.)

 

STARBUCK

Holy frak! 

 

(The transports stop near the Vipers and several officers emerge.)

 

OFFICER

Gentlemen, whoever or whatever flew those craft in are not from Terra.  Their technology is too advanced.  Let’s just hope they’ve not been influenced or brought here by the Eastern Alliance. 

 

STARBUCK

(to his communicator)

Let the record show that in my first contact with people from Terra my laser’s set for stun.

(to the officers)

That’s close enough!  And, uh, lower your weapons. 

 

OFFICER

There are nine of us to one of him.

 

STARBUCK

That you can see.

 

OFFICER

Those ships appear to be single-man craft.  Even if there are two of you, you are intruders into an airspace which is under the protection of the People’s Nationalist Force.  Surrender your weapon and submit to interrogation, or I will have no choice but to take you by force, dead or alive.  Men!

 

(Starbuck fires his laser and the officers drop to the ground.  He then fires at the transport vehicles, destroying them.)

 

STARBUCK

I sure hope I don’t have to pay for those machines.

(to his communicator)

Apollo, if you can hear me, I’m on my way.

 

(In his office, Dr. Horning overhears this as he examines Apollo’s communicator.)

 

HORNING

“I’m on my way, Apollo”?

 

(In Brenda’s apartment, she answers the door chime and finds General Maxwell, whom she embraces.)

 

BRENDA

Father!  Oh, you’re alive!  Oh!  Oh, father, what’s been going on?  It’s like everything’s upside down on Terra. 

 

MAXWELL

Baby, I wish I could tell you, but I’m afraid things are even worse than we imagined.

 

BRENDA

How do you mean?

 

MAXWELL

I’m sorry I had to leave without telling you, but I’ve been on a secret mission for the Praesidium.  It appears the President’s been lying to all of us. 

 

BRENDA

But you were the closest of friends.

 

MAXWELL

Once.  But now he’s just a tired old man who’s so worn down by wars, public opinion, and God-knows-what-else that I’m afraid he’s just cracked. 

 

BRENDA

I can’t believe that.

 

MAXWELL

What if I told you that the Praesidium suspects that the President’s already surrendered every single one of Terra’s satellite planets?

 

BRENDA

No, father, that can’t be true.  How could the President hope to keep that from us?

 

MAXWELL

Maybe he believes that the alternative to peace is not necessarily war, that there’s some middle ground we can strike with those animals from the Eastern Alliance.

 

BRENDA

Do you actually have proof that we’ve lost our satellites?

 

MAXWELL

No.  I couldn’t even get to Lunar One because of the Eastern Alliance destroyers.

 

BRENDA

Father, I don’t know if this is important, but did you know that Charlie’s back?

 

MAXWELL

Colonel Watts?  What are you talking about?

 

BRENDA

He’s here, on Terra.  He called me.  I picked him up just outside the city.  He had some story about his plane crashing.  He was talking crazy.  He just wasn’t himself.

 

MAXWELL

Brenda, if he was back, the Praesidium would want to know about that immediately!  He was on Lunar One when it was attacked.  And he’d be the proof I need against a President’s deception. 

 

BRENDA

Surely the government must know by now.  I called security.

 

MAXWELL

What?

 

BRENDA

He wasn’t making any sense, father.  He sounded delirious.

 

MAXWELL

That call may have cost Charlie his life. 

 

(Brenda answers the door chime again to find Brace with an armed guard.)

 

BRACE

Brenda.  General Maxwell.  This is an unexpected pleasure.

 

(In the prison, General Maxwell is led into the cell opposite Apollo’s, which is already occupied by Stone.  Brenda is placed in Apollo’s cell.)

 

MAXWELL

Charlie!

 

STONE

General Maxwell! 

 

MAXWELL

Stoney, you too?  How many are in here?

 

STONE

I don’t know, sir.  Probably everyone who questioned the President’s policies.

 

BRENDA

Charlie, I’m sorry.  I thought I was doing the right thing.

 

APOLLO

I know, but – but – I – I – I’m not Charlie. 

 

MAXWELL

You’re what?

 

APOLLO

I – I’m not Charlie.  Look, I know I look like Charlie, but – but I’m not Charlie!  Uh— I – I’m from another galaxy.

 

MAXWELL

What’d they do to his head?

 

STONE

I wish I knew, sir.

 

APOLLO

Would you listen to what I’m saying?  I’m not crazy.

(sighs)

 

(Starbuck arrives outside the prison building.)

 

STARBUCK

(sighs)

 

JOHN

(appears)

Hello.  You’re not thinking of blasting your way in and out of here, are you?

 

STARBUCK

Who said that?

 

(John touches Starbuck on the shoulder, turning his uniform white.)

 

JOHN

And now you can see me, and remember.

 

STARBUCK

The ship of lights.

 

JOHN

Precisely.

 

STARBUCK

You’re the one who brought Apollo here.  Where is he?  Wh-what have you gotten him into?

 

JOHN

I’m afraid he’s incarcerated, in there.

 

STARBUCK

Uh, I can take care of that.

 

JOHN

Now, just a moment.  You’re not contemplating violence, are you?

 

STARBUCK

Ahh, yes, unless you know a better way.

 

JOHN

Er, no.  Not in any way that I would be permitted to use.  I am not allowed to interfere in any way.  It’s a rotten job.

 

STARBUCK

Hmm, well, then stand aside, or I’ll walk right through you.

 

JOHN

(addressing the Seraphs)

I know it’s not our way.  It’s the best I can do with the material I have got.  I tell you, they’re primitives!

 

(Inside the prison building, Starbuck encounters two guards conversing, who start to draw their weapons.)

 

STARBUCK

Ah-ah-ah-ah, you don’t want to do that!  Or I’ll do this to you.

(shoots a lamp globe, which shatters on the floor)

Now, drop ’em, or I’ll incinerate you!  Now, move!

 

(In his office, Dr. Horning is still toying with Apollo’s communicator.)

 

STARBUCK (over communicator)

Drop it or I’ll incinerate you!

 

(Horning drops the communicator just before Starbuck enters the room holding the two guards at gunpoint.)

 

STARBUCK

Now then, I believe you’re holding a man here against his will, a man dressed very much like I am.

 

(Starbuck heads for the cells with his prisoners, who now include Horning.)

 

STARBUCK

Apollo!

 

APOLLO

I never thought I’d be so glad to see anybody in my whole life.  No!  Don’t come near us until they turn off the force field. 

 

STARBUCK

Come on!  Quick!

(a guard hands him the key; Starbuck releases the prisoners and confines Horning and the guards)

Right in there!  Move! 

 

APOLLO

Starbuck, let the others out too.  That’s her father. 

 

BRENDA

Who is this?  You’re dressed alike and he called you Apollo.

 

MAXWELL

You mean that crazy story you told us is true?

 

STONE

If it was, maybe they can help us stop the Eastern Alliance.

 

MAXWELL

No one can do that.

 

APOLLO

Give us a chance.  We’ve quite a lot of help on our side.

 

STARBUCK

Come on, let’s go.

 

APOLLO

Yeah!

 

(Galactica bridge)

 

TIGH

Within one centar we’ll be in striking range of the planet Terra.  Do you wish to reduce speed?

 

ADAMA

No.  Continue at light speed.

 

(Praesidium building)

 

MAXWELL

The President’ll be here in one hour. 

 

STONE

He’s going to call us liars.  We have no tangible proof.

 

MAXWELL

Yeah, I know. 

(to Apollo)

Look, whoever you are, you’re the only one who’s actually been on Paradeen and seen the holocaust.  Now, what can you do to convince the Praesidium that the President’s been lying to them?

 

APOLLO

(sighs)

Where’s John?

 

STARBUCK

I wouldn’t expect much help from him.  He seems to help those who help themselves.

 

APOLLO

(sighs again)

Yeah.  What about our ships?

 

MAXWELL

What kind of ships?

 

STARBUCK

Vipers.  Faster than anything you’ve got, advanced enough to prove we’re from another galaxy.

 

(John appears.)

 

JOHN

You haven’t got time to show them your ships. 

 

STARBUCK

Have you got a better idea?

 

STONE

Who’s he talking to?

 

APOLLO

Look, we’re here.  That’s a plus.  What else can we do, John?

 

MAXWELL

Great.  I’m challenging the President in front of the whole Praesidium, and my only evidence is two men who are talking to someone who isn’t here.

 

JOHN

I told you.

 

STARBUCK

Yah, yah, you told us, but you can’t help us. 

(sighs)

Look, if someone can take me to my Viper—

 

APOLLO

Where is it?

 

STARBUCK

Right next to yours.

 

BRENDA

I can take you there.  I remember where I picked up Charlie– (laughs) Apollo.

 

STONE

General, we can’t let them go.

 

MAXWELL

Well, they can’t do us any good unless they can prove they’re from another galaxy.

 

APOLLO

Starbuck, you’ve gotta contact the Galactica.  Get them to put on some kinda show of strength.  Maybe then the Praesidium will listen to us. 

 

BRENDA

What’s the Galactica?

 

STARBUCK

It’s a, uh, yuh— I’ll explain it later.  We’ll be back within a centar, all right?

 

APOLLO

Okay.

 

BRENDA

Whatever that is, I hope it’s less than an hour.

 

STARBUCK

Come on, let’s go.

 

JOHN

She’s quite right.  At this very moment, the Eastern Alliance is planning a surprise attack on these people.  It’s the beginning of the end.

 

APOLLO

Are you sure?

 

JOHN

I’m sure.

 

APOLLO

It’ll be some time before the Galactica can get here, even at light speed. 

 

STONE

You have ships that travel at the speed of light?

 

APOLLO

It won’t be soon enough.  Look, I have it on the – (sighs) best authority that the Eastern Alliance is planning a big farewell party for you tonight. 

 

STONE

How can you know that, unless you’re working for them?

 

(John vanishes.)

 

MAXWELL

No, if he were he wouldn’t be warning us.  And if this were the night that they’re planning their final strike, they couldn’t have timed it better.  Obviously, they know the President’s on the edge and he can’t contain the news of what’s happened much longer.

 

STONE

Why can’t we just throw everything we’ve got at them, right now, on our own?

 

APOLLO

You can’t do that, Stone.  That’s what separates you from the Eastern Alliance.

 

MAXWELL

He’s right.  Now, we’ve got to plan right now what we’re going to say to the Praesidium.  We’ve got to convince them that your story’s the truth and we don’t have much time.

 

APOLLO

Let’s go.

 

(Eastern Alliance war room)

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

It is decided.  A swift and decisive attack by our forces this very night will provide complete annihilation of the Nationalists and subject us to acceptable losses in return.  All of our primary personnel have already been escorted into deep underground chambers that are as safe as this war room.

 

ALLIANCE LEADER

Shouldn’t we warn the general population?

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

No!  Overpopulation is one of our most severe problems.  With the annihilation of the Nationalists’ entire populations, combined with the loss of the non-designated members of our own Alliance, an ideally-sized group of loyalists will then be formed, which will supply population for our planet and all of its satellites. 

 

(Brenda’s car)

 

STARBUCK

Well?

 

BRENDA

Well, I know it’s around here someplace.

 

STARBUCK

Someplace?  Brenda, we don’t have much time. 

 

BRENDA

We’ve got thirty minutes. 

 

STARBUCK

Look, even if I got back to my ship right now, I couldn’t get back before the Praesidium meeting started.

 

BRENDA

Well, is it my fault you lost your ship?

 

STARBUCK

You don’t even believe it’s out here, do you?  Hmm?

 

BRENDA

I don’t know what to believe.

 

STARBUCK

There, stop! 

(gets out of car and looks around)

Yeah, this looks like the right place.  Let’s go.

(gets back in and they drive on)

 

(In the Praesidium chamber, the President is addressing the body.)

 

PRESIDENT

General Maxwell has accused me of withholding information from you – that our satellites, which provide us with our fuel and our food, have been attacked, some of them even destroyed.  There is some truth to his allegations. 

(Praesidium begins murmuring)

However, I felt that any word prematurely given out would lead our generals to demand a retaliation, an act that would bring us unto devastation.  I am here to announce this night a secret treaty made with the Eastern Alliance, whereby all hostilities will be halted! 

(members applaud)

 

MAXWELL

A treaty with the Eastern Alliance?  Has he lost his mind?

 

STONE

Hasn’t everybody in the past twenty-four hours?

 

(John appears in the audience.)

 

PRESIDENT

The crux of the matter is and has always been disarmament – a continual buildup of military might that leaves our world no margin for error.  The most elemental misjudgment and everything we’ve known is gone, evaporated, in less time than it will take you as a responsible body to ratify this treaty.  The terms are simple.  Phase One, both the Eastern Alliance and the Free Nationalists will simultaneously disarm under mutual supervision.  Phase Two, we agree to negotiate in good faith a new and greater body of government, which will not only preserve our individual nationalities, but also guarantee to each of our nations, and to the members of the Eastern Alliance alike, equal access to the resources and food of our planet system.  Now, before I ask for a formal vote, I ask General Maxwell if he would like to comment on my proposal.

 

MAXWELL

He’s boxed me in and there’s nothing I can say.

 

APOLLO

I can.

(to his communicator)

Starbuck, come in.  Come in, Starbuck.  Starbuck, if you can hear me, I’ll stall ’em as long as I can.

 

MAXWELL

Ordinarily I would cry out against appeasement.  I would shout “betrayal” over the President’s systematically allowing our defense posture to deteriorate beyond repair.  The time has come and gone when we as a free body can express opinions and choose our fate.  Our fate has been sealed!  If you will, I will call upon a visitor to our nation, a young man who has come from afar to tell us that our predicament is not unique, that once upon a time there was another world, very much like our own, which ended as abruptly as I believe ours is about to end now.  I give you Captain Apollo of the battlestar Galactica, a ship from a world and a star system far from our own.

 

PRESIDENT

What kind of trick is this, General?

 

MAXWELL

Hear him out, Mr. President.  If he makes a fool of me, you win.

 

PRESIDENT

The chair recognizes Captain Apollo.

 

APOLLO

(nods to John, who nods back)

There was once, far across this universe, a system of twelve planets who had reached a level of commerce and peace unparalleled in our knowledge of man.  The names of these planets are Caprica, Sagittaria, Virgon, …

 

(Eastern Alliance war room)

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

Stand by to launch all missiles.

 

(Galactica bridge)

 

TIGH

We’re within communications range, Commander.

 

ADAMA

Try to contact Viper Four.

 

(Brenda’s car)

 

BRENDA

Now, look, enough’s enough.  I’m gonna turn around.

 

STARBUCK

I – uh – I’m tellin’ you, Brenda, it has to be here.  I couldn’t’ve walked any farther than this.  There it is! 

 

BRENDA

I don’t believe it!

 

(Praesidium chamber)

 

APOLLO

Freedom – freedom cannot be negotiated.  It is rarely given.  It is usually won at great cost and sacrifice.  Once lost, the price for regaining it will be ever higher.  I came from a world where the people believed that the opposite of war was peace.  We found out the hard way that the opposite of war is more often slavery, and that strength, strength alone, can support freedom.

 

(Eastern Alliance war room)

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

Launch!

 

(Alliance missiles launch.)

 

(Praesidium meeting)

 

PRESIDENT

I compliment you on your strategy, General.  Yes, yes.  Very theatrical.  But considering the implausibility of your guest and the tangibility of my treaty—

(Stone whispers something to Maxwell)

—forgive me if I don’t become overly concerned with the outcome of this vote.

 

MAXWELL

Well, neither am I.  The Eastern Alliance has launched—

 

PRESIDENT

Launched what?

 

MAXWELL

Everything they have.

 

PRESIDENT

Well, that’s, uh – that’s not possible.  I – I have this treaty.  They’ve signed it.

 

MAXWELL

Well, frame it!  But hurry.

 

PRESIDENT

Now, what can we do now?

 

MAXWELL

Nothing.  We’re out of it.  Everything’s automatic.  They launch, we launch, it’s all done.  All we can do now’s wait.  We’ve got about six minutes.

 

(at Starbuck’s Viper)

 

BRENDA

What are you going to do to convince the Praesidium?

 

STARBUCK

I’m going to get back into orbit and try and contact the Galactica.  If that doesn’t work, maybe I’ll, uh, land on their front lawn and put on a little laser show.  At least that’ll get their attention.

 

BRENDA

When will you be back?

 

STARBUCK

I don’t know.  Now, stand back.  I’ve got to launch.  And, Brenda, thanks for your help.

 

BRENDA

Wait – I have to know.  Where’s the real Charlie?

 

(Starbuck launches.)

 

JOHN (on Starbuck’s viewscreen)

Starbuck.

 

STARBUCK

(looks around)

Now where are you?

 

JOHN

The Galactica is trying to reach you.  In about three minutes, enough flying missiles are going to pass each other in the air to devastate four-fifths of this planet beneath us. 

 

STARBUCK

The Galactica.  Her lasers.

 

JOHN

Precisely.  You haven’t much time.

 

STARBUCK

Viper Four to Galactica.  Viper Four to Galactica.

 

(Galactica bridge)

 

OMEGA

Commander, Viper Four coming in over comline.

 

ADAMA

Feed it up to the bridge quickly.

 

OMEGA

Ready, Commander. 

 

ADAMA (over Starbuck’s comline)

Come in, Viper Four.

 

STARBUCK (from his Viper)

Commander, I haven’t time to explain in detail, but at any micron you’re gonna pick up a myriad of flying objects angling across the planet below me.

 

TIGH

We’re picking up rising missiles now.  They’re just clearing the planet’s atmosphere and entering the ionosphere.

 

OMEGA

Computon readout shows them to be armed devices of some nuclear type.

 

STARBUCK

We’ve got to destroy them, Commander.  They’re going to blow each other up.

 

ADAMA

Battle stations.  Stand by force shields.

 

OMEGA

Force shields standing by.

 

ADAMA

Maximum laser power stand by.

 

OMEGA

Laser power standing by.

 

ADAMA

Positive shield now.

 

(Eastern Alliance war room)

 

LOUDSPEAKER VOICE

One minute to impact.

 

(Praesidium chamber)

 

STONE

Everything launched on schedule, sir.

 

PRESIDENT

How reassuring to know our technology is sound.

 

STONE

Thirty seconds to impact.

 

APOLLO

Starbuck, come in, Starbuck.  Do you read me?  Come in, Starbuck!

 

(Galactica bridge)

 

OMEGA

Commander, all the missiles are now in the ionosphere.  Some of them are completing arcs and starting back towards the planet’s surface.  They’ll all re-enter the atmosphere in fifteen microns. 

 

ADAMA

Ready?  Fire.

 

(Galactica fires lasers, detonating missiles in the ionosphere.)

 

TIGH

We’re getting a chain reaction, sir.  Missiles destroying each other.

 

ADAMA

We must destroy every single missile.

 

STARBUCK (still in his Viper)

Wow!  What a show!

 

ADAMA

Are you all right?

 

STARBUCK

Yeah, I’m fine.  It’s a good thing those things are going off above the atmosphere. 

(laughs)

I’d give anything to see the faces on the boys that launched those machines.

 

(Eastern Alliance war room)

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

Well.

 

ALLIANCE LEADER

Zero minus ten.

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

Zero minus ten.  That means impact has begun.  How’ve we done?  Direct hits?  Near hits?  What?

 

ALLIANCE LEADER

Uhhhh—

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

What does “uhhhh” mean?

 

ALLIANCE LEADER

According to our data, none of our missiles have hit target as yet.

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

Well, that’s impossible, didn’t you know that? 

 

ALLIANCE MEMBER

Yes.  According to our intelligence reports, they have nothing that could intercept or destroy our missiles – that we know of.

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

What do you mean, “that we know of”?  Do you mean they have a shield capable of blocking out all of our firepower?

 

ALLIANCE MEMBER

It’s certainly beginning to look that way. 

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

Then they can launch wave after wave against us until we’re annihilated.

 

ALLIANCE MEMBER

So far, none of their missiles have reached our space.

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

How so?  Surely they know we’ve attacked. 

 

ALLIANCE MEMBER

It’s all very confusing.  There are reports of explosions high up in the ionosphere. 

 

SUPREME COMMANDANT

Hmm.  What treachery could they be up to?

 

ALLIANCE MEMBER

(sighs)

Sir, may I suggest that this might be the time for direct communication with their President, before it is too late?

 

(Praesidium chamber)

 

APOLLO

(to his communicator)

Starbuck, are you all right?

 

STARBUCK

Eh, a little shaken, but fine.  Uh, heading for the Galactica.

 

APOLLO

Thank the Lords of Kobol.  I’ll be joining you in about a centon.  Apollo out.

 

MAXWELL

You stopped the nuclear warheads and all.  How did you do that?

 

JOHN

For goodness’ sake, don’t tell them.  Now that you’ve put the fear of God into them, let them worry about it for a while.

 

APOLLO

There are some things we are not permitted to tell you. 

(John nods)

Even our civilization has its military secrets. 

(laughs) 

Perhaps in time our Council will elect to open formal relations.  In the meantime—

 

MAXWELL

You’re not leaving?!  There – there’s so many things you could teach us.

 

JOHN

(shakes his head “no”)

 

APOLLO

(sighs)

For now our presence could bring you a greater danger than the Alliance.  We’ll be back when the time is right.

 

PRESIDENT

Excuse me, Captain.  May I have a word with you, General?  The Supreme Commandant of the Eastern Alliance has asked me whether the treaty has been approved or not.  They want to sue for peace on our terms.  What shall I tell them?

 

MAXWELL

I think you can safely count on the military’s support.  I don’t think the Alliance is going to be double-dealing us for some time.  Apollo, we have you to thank for—  Stoney, where – where’d Apollo go?

 

STONE

I didn’t notice.

 

(Street outside the Praesidium building)

 

APOLLO

Ahh, just one more thing before you, uh, vanish again.

 

JOHN

If I can.

 

APOLLO

Is this Earth?

 

JOHN

I can’t.

 

APOLLO

Oh, but you’ve got to.  I’ve risked my life, Starbuck’s, the entire fleet.  You owe me at least that.

 

JOHN

(addressing the Seraphs)

Thank you.

(to Apollo)

I’m sorry, this is not Earth, and it is not the end of your journey. 

 

APOLLO

How much farther is Earth?

 

JOHN

I’m sorry, I’m only here to—

 

APOLLO

I know – to advise.

 

JOHN

But you must have faith. 

 

APOLLO

(sighs)

Thank you.

 

JOHN

(laughs)

All in a day’s work.

 

APOLLO

Are all your days like this?

 

JOHN

Heavens, no.

 

 

-END TRANSCRIPT-

 

 

NOTES

 

The telemovie Experiment in Terra comprises newly filmed material, clips from various episodes, a truncated version of the Galactica 1980 episode “The Return of Starbuck,” and an expanded version of the “Experiment in Terra” episode.  This transcript consists of the expanded version of the episode.

 

Although Boomer speaks the sentence “We could get the Galactica to come to us,” it would have made much more sense as part of Starbuck’s line immediately preceding, and perhaps was originally intended as such.

 

After Brenda asks where the real Charlie is, Starbuck's scripted reply is "If I could tell you, I would."